Must I dream and always see your face

You know when you stay at someone else's house, in their lounge or their spare room. And there's one of those clocks that's all unassuming by day but by night, it takes over some amplification superpower and all you can hear is the sound of it's ticking? That may accurately describe my biological clock at the moment. Except this one I can't just hide in a drawer or a wardrobe.

That's what I'm blaming my current obsession to men on anyway.

I do love men usually, don't get me wrong. But lately, it's like a ninja focus. I can't think about much else, and it appears I don't talk about much else either.

Walking down the street with a friend a few weeks back, telling her a story, and there was a very attractive man on the side of the road waiting to cross, who appeared to have just left the gym, still wearing a singlet, and arms that could belong to Thor (ok not really that big, but you get the point). At this point, I was so busy looking at him that I fell silent and then could not even see my train of thought, let alone retrieve it. I almost stopped in the street, my head doing near 180 so I could keep looking at him.

Another friend, who works in the cafe downstairs at work. I talk to her every few days. I have been watching a fair amount of movies lately, and it appears the only review that I give on them is whether or not the actors in it are hot. I don't know if I even describe anything about the movie other than 'it was alright, and "insert hot actors name here" is in it which is a good enough reason to see it. Pretty much every time I talk to her. When I went to see Evil Dead, my review was based on the large amount of pierced and tattooed men in the audience (A LOT - it was like heaven, with a horror movie thrown in).

Watching the X Factor - I focus on how hot the contestants are. Surely that's more important than their talent? 30 is the right age to officially be a cougar right?

I did take comfort in the fact that at the Danny Bhoy show the other night (who, incidentally, is very attractive), that my cousin was the first to scour the crowd for the most attractive man to perve at while waiting for the show to start (and I am very grateful that she pointed him out to me. Again, he was of muscly arms...).

I am going to the Gunslinger's Ball tomorrow night - partly because I love the music and the vibe. Partly for the attractive men in the bands. In fact, it's probably a 50/50 ratio...

It is ridiculous. I have always loved men. I have always enjoyed looking at them (and once took a friend's class during an entire semester of Uni, rather than attending my own classes, due to the shoulders of a guy that sat in front of her/us). But this is almost getting to be a bit much.

Admittedly, my current dry spell is lasting a lot longer than a regular NZ summer drought - it's been a year. That's a long time. But I've been longer before without falling weak at the mere sight of a man. It's getting difficult to even function (ok that's an exaggeration, but it is definitely very distracting!).